Perspective

Sitting in the worship service with my church yesterday, I had a realization. It was during the pastor’s sermon. He was making a point about how no matter what sin or error a believer has committed, we have a Savior who understand, advocates, made provision, and gives grace. This is the passage he quoted, from...

Step Nine

“Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others”   Step 9 is the part of our journey where we try – to the best of our ability – to clean up the messes that we have made. In this step we make amends to those...

Step Eight

“Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all” If you weren’t a list-maker before you came into recovery, you probably will be by the time you’re through the 12 steps. There are a lot of lists made in this process – we list resentments, fears,...

Step Seven

“Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings”   Now that we have listed the defects of character that drive our acting out behavior (Step 6), it is once again time to ask God’s help in our recovery. This step is similar to Step 3 in that the Big Book outlines a specific prayer that is...

One Day at a Time

I have a 20-year old privacy fence around my backyard. The posts and rails are in good shape but the boards have been breaking and cracking and detaching over the years. One of my “pandemic projects” has been to replace all of the boards on the fence. I have spent many hot and sweaty hours...

Step Six

“Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.” One of my favorite phrases in the Big Book of A.A. comes after the description of Step 5. The passage says “Carefully reading the first five proposals we ask if we have omitted anything, for we are building an arch through which we...

Developing a Sobriety/Recovery Plan

In any endeavor in life, whether it is business or personal, the chances of success go up significantly when there is a good plan in place and that plan is followed. You may have heard the phrase “plan the work and work the plan”. Recovery from addiction is no exception to this rule. Some might...

Step 5

In my last blog post, we discussed the topic of honesty and how it helps us to become sober (and also how sobriety helps us with our honesty!). And while honesty is part of all 12 steps, the fifth step is all about honesty. When we admit the exact nature of our wrongs to God,...

Honesty

I don’t know what the reverse of a “catch-22” is officially called, but when it comes to honesty and sobriety, their relationship is a “reverse catch-22”. Being honest helps me to stay sober, and staying sober helps me to be honest. There’s a saying, “All addicts are liars,” and while this certainly holds some truth,...

Identifying Our Triggers

One of the tasks that is generally a part of any recovery program is identifying people, institutions, and situations that often move us in the direction of acting out. As we recover and begin to recognize these triggers, we will be more equipped to prepare and respond to them without acting out. So, how do...

Getting to the Roots

This post is about The Roots Retreat, Awaken’s therapeutic intensive weekend for men seeking recovery from addictive or unwanted sexual behavior. Our next men’s Roots Retreat is scheduled for June 4-7, 2020. We also offer a Roots Retreat for women who have been sexually betrayed by their husbands/male partners. We’ll offer a post on the...

Step Four

Step Four: “Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves” Steps 1 through 3 of the Twelve Steps are things that mostly happened in our heads and with our words. We “admitted we were powerless”, we “came to believe”, and we “made a decision”. These are critical tasks and it would be nearly impossible...