Step Three

Last week, I wrote that steps 1 through 3 of the Twelve Steps are the “Made a Decision” steps and the rest of the steps are the “Take Action” steps. (See the entire post here.) Let’s dig a little deeper into the last of these “Made a Decision” steps and see what we find. Step...

Grace and Effort (not mutually exclusive)

Question: There were once three frogs sitting on a log. One of them made a decision to jump in the water. How many frogs were left on the log? Answer: Three – the frog made a decision, but he took no action! Working a program of recovery is a lot like the story of the...

Social Distance vs. Isolation… Working Recovery in the Midst of COVID-19

This morning I went for a run, starting and finishing in the parking lot of a local coffee shop, just like I do almost every Monday morning. This morning was different, though. The parking lot, usually packed, was empty. The only two cars there were those of the employees inside, serving zero customers. Over the...

Self-Care is NOT Selfish, part 2

I mentioned in my last post that early in my recovery from sexual addiction I realized I needed to consider a shift in my thinking about self-care. Every message I’d been taught or had held reinforced a consistent message. Self-care is selfish. Don’t think about yourself. Think about others. Teaching from trusted authority figures doubled...

Self-Care is NOT Selfish (part 1)

When I first entered recovery in 2009, I started to hear a lot of people talk about self-care. My therapist talked about it. The men in recovery meetings talked about it. Authors of books I read talked about it. Self-care seemed pretty important. That created a bit of a mini-crisis for me. Because self-care went...

For Me, or For Others? (What’s My Motivation for Sobriety?)

Here is the latest in our series of posts from a member of Awaken’s men’s fellowship. We hope his perspective on sobriety and its motivations will encourage you to think about what drives your recovery program! I have always deeply admired people who come into recovery simply because they recognize an addiction in their lives...

Active Surrender

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus said: “You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment.”  and… “You have...

Finding a Sponsor

We believe that for recovery to happen God must do “for us what we could not do for ourselves.” A huge part of how He does this is through the encouragement, fellowship, and help of other people in our lives. When we start looking at what other people’s help looks like, the word sponsorship begins...

Sobriety vs. Abstinence

When working a program of recovery, one word that is spoken all the time is SOBRIETY. “Am I sober?” “How many days sober am I?” “I did _______…Do I need to reset my sobriety?” What do we mean when we use that word? Is sobriety simply the absence of acting out behavior? If so, does...

Gifts of Recovery

When I first came into recovery, my only goal was to figure out a way to stop the behaviors that were destroying my life. I wasn’t interested in a “spiritual awakening” or even in serenity. I just knew I had to quit acting...

Step One

We’re excited to begin to feature regular blog posts from a member of Awaken’s men’s recovery community. Our hope is that his posts will encourage and inspire you to believe recovery is possible, and to pursue it every...

Heaviness and Hope

I’m not going to lie…late Fall and early Winter is a tough time of year for me. Some of it has to do with how overcast the sky is during the winter. Some of it has to do with the time change and getting dark at 5...